You see we are all wearing masks because of Covid. And, I wear glasses and can barely see beyond my nose without them. Are you getting the picture? We have all worn masks for so long now that anyone who wears glasses certainly is getting the picture.
So given a cold night, mask and no glasses it was all I could do not to trip and fall as I negotiated from building to building down dimly lit paths.
As far as photography goes I thought I had came prepared. One lens, a 50mm f1.8, hand held. It was not to be. Without my glasses I adjusted the diopter as far as possible to present an in focus view through the viewfinder. But I couldn't walk around looking through my camera.
So I point and shot what i thought were interesting subjects, waiting for the little chirp of the camera to tell me I had focus lock.
The results were less than disappointing. Most were shot at ISO 25,600. To begin with my camera doesn't do that very well. Second, hand held in the dark and mostly blind is not a recipe for a great in focus shot. Finally, with so litte light the shutter speed with the camera set on aperture priority mode was bordering on unworkable when hand held, even at f1.8.
And so all things are not always possible. The important thing is the effort that was made and the commradery I enjoyed with fellow photographers.
84 images, not really any keepers. A tripod would have helped a great deal but I didn't feel it was the tihing to do considering the cramped spaces and crowds of people.
So ends this blog. A good time, no photo results to speak of. Better success on my next outing.
]]>So this is not a blog about Lilly.
Winston Churchill referred to it as the black dog when it came calling in his life. Let's call it what it is, depression. According to the World Health Organization almost 6 percent of the population suffers from clinical depression. Depression is an illness, a disease and for many it is virtually untreatable. For the vast majority of sufferers, because of lack of medical care or poverty, there is no help available. This is not about the depression that accompanies the occasional life struggles that comes with loss; loved ones, jobs, money etc. This about long term and seemingly unprovoked feelings of sadness characterized by lack of enthusiasm for life in general and even the things that would normally excite you. This is about long term suffering for no apparent reason. It is about the chemistry of the brain and it is a disease just as real as any other.
Depression intersects with all stratum of society; the famous and the infamous, the well-known and the unknown, the rich and the poor, educated and not. It has inherited traits but no one is immune. Please remember that people fake happiness but cannot truly disguise depression. Robin Williams was the poster child of depression.
I suffer from clinical depression. I have suffered from it my entire life and it is debilitating. Most readers will stop at this point. But for the few, probably those who suffer, who want to read on, let me explain how this relates to photography.
The trick to dealing with depression is to keep busy and better to be creative and keep busy. This is not easy and I don’t mean to trivialize it in any way. The hardest thing I do each day is get out of bed. The second hardest thing I do each day is stay out of bed.
But when you open your eyes in the morning, if you can have a moment of interest in some activity you may have planned for the day then you have a small spark that may start the fire of enthusiasm to propel you forward with your day.
For me this is photography; I try as much as possible to have some small creative task that I would like to accomplish the next day when I go to bed at night. The need to be creative and fulfilling that need is key to my mental wellbeing. In the morning that small, but not overwhelming task is my spark, my opportunity to have sufficient interest in the day to put my feet on the floor and propel myself forward with the day. Again, I don’t want to trivialize this momentary mindset and the initiative it can ignite. It is subtle and can be elusive. There are days when I have to forgive myself for not being able to rally to the challenge. It is incredibly important to be gentle on yourself if you suffer from depression.
I want to be open and clear about my illness. For too long mental illness has been hidden away accompanied with feelings of shame and isolation. Depression is an illness, a disease every bit as real as cancer. As a society we have to stop holding the unspoken belief and attitude that mental illness should remain a private struggle. One of the most influential motivators of well-being for issues of mental health is social interaction. It is vital that we be open about mental illness – vital for those who suffer and vital for those who don’t - that they should accept it as part of the human condition.
If you have read this far I congratulate you for your acceptance and interest. Please leave a comment and especially if you suffer from clinical depression, let’s talk. The brain can be a self-healing organ but only in the company of friends, family and neighbors with openness and understanding.
So my blog has suffered along with me. I want to get back to making regular posts about my photography and my life story as it unfolds. To those who may be critical I offer my apology without excuses. You see in depression the mind goes in two directions. First there is what it wants to accomplish and second, there is the sabotage of sadness and lack of interest and enthusiasm.
Through medication, counselling, friends and family I am in a better place than I have been but by no means cured of this terrible affliction. So this is today’s blog entry and I hope it can be the start of a renewed effort.
I do encourage you to comment. It helps me in my struggles knowing that I am not alone; and it may just help you or someone you know in this constant struggle towards wellness.
Today was about open honesty and why my blog has suffered. Going forward I want to focus on my photographic journey. It has been 10 years since I picked up my first DSLR. I have learned a great deal and come a long way. But each day is an opportunity to learn something new. For me, learning something new each day is a quest, a passion and a necessity.
Please join me on my journey. Come along as I hone my skills and branch out with my interests. Photography is a beautiful art form and we are so lucky to the amazing technology so readily available today.
I hope you share your own artistic endeavours with me. If you comment on my blog it will enrich both of our lives. Thank you.
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The day was lovely, made all the more so by the lack of flying bugs. Two things that can really spoil a hike is extreme heat and mosquitoes.
It was surprising to me just how many people were parked at the trail head, a summer only road in rather poor condition. This was my opportunity to socialize a little and make inquiries about the elusive lookout. But, no one had found it and I began to think the trail was badly named.
Lilly and I hiked for an hour one way. We passed several others and shared some congenial woodland chat but none could help me in my search for the grand view I was seeking.
Returning the way we came, quite tired and satisfied that there was no lookout to be had, we headed toward home. I did note though on the way to the trail, a lovely view of the bay looking back toward Wasaga Beach from the side of the roadway. So not to be skunked for the day I happily took the image you see and thought it probably better than any other view the trail may yet still have in hiding from me.
]]>I went there yesterday and, well it was barely a road and half way up I started to second guess my wisdom of driving there. What do you do, no place to turn around it is only the width of one car. Well careful has always been my middle name so onward I went and arrived at the top. No harm was done to the vehicle in the making of this image.
The recent hot and humid weather had abated a little, the sky was full of puffy clouds and visibility was pretty good. It didn't take long to get the shot I had in mind. In fact Lilly gave me that look when I asked her to jump back into the car - is that all I get!
My fall season hike there will have to start at the bottom of the hill. I did get to use a seldom needed but cool feature of my car. I press a button when going down such step hills and without using the brakes, the car rolls down at such a manageably slow speed - very nice.
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Well the shot didn't come off exactly as I hoped but I like the finished image anyway. It was a hot humid day and the atmosphere really impacted the clarity of the image.
However the sky was very moody and I suspected a rain storm was imminent. Quick check on the radar - oh darn, phone in the car - again. I have to start remembering to unplug it and put in my pocket. I didn't want to tear down my setup but it was a public spot. Could almost see the car so made the decision to make a quick dash back and grab the phone.
Well rain was coming and it looked like it would be exciting, maybe some lightning strikes on the island or the lighthouse. But unfortunately the rain came fast and furious - on me long before it got to the bay. I stuck it out with the lens dry bag over the camera and took a few shots. Lightning didn't happen after all and Lilly and I got thoroughly soaked - we headed back to the car - no point running at that point.
Speaking of Lilly she is the best photographer's friend. She seems to just get it. When I set up the camera she always stays close by, minding her own business, always the very best of behavior. She sat patiently beside me through the down pour, never complaining never fussing. I couldn't ask for more and might expect far less except that I have come to know her as the best of friends, always sticking with me through thick and thin on my outings.
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So off I went with my photo buddy, my puppy Lilly. It's difficult to find forest locations that are accessible and interesting but I had a spot in mind that is one of my favorites.
It might make the blog more interesting if I said I was on the hunt for fantasy forest creatures, that is what the image I'm sharing looks like to me. What do you think, do you see a dragon looking out between the strangely shaped cedar tree?
I'm looking forward to visiting the location again, perhaps with some morning fog. That would really add mystery to the dragon of the forest.
Please sign my guest book if you haven't already and thanks for spending time on my photo site.
]]>My friend Eric and I went out and waited for darkness to set in.
I knew I needed a wider lens than the 70 mm used for the first image and so I took my 50 mm f1.4 prime on one camera body and my 24 mm f2.8 prime on the other.
As darkness fell the dipper appeared very high in the sky, almost overhead. It was pretty obvious that the 50 mm lens would not do it. Too bad, I wanted the reach it would give and knew the 24 mm would render the comet quite small.
Never mind, I quickly set up my shot with the 24 mm which also meant I now had to cross the road side ditch to get under and beyond power lines overhead - following the lead of Eric who already had that figured out.
The comet was not as bright as 2 weeks ago but gradually appeared on queue below the dipper - which was gradually moving closer to the horizon as time when by. A waxing moon did us the big favor of setting below the horizon before things got really dark. The few clouds present when we arrived disappeared and even the voracious mosquitoes gave us a break around 1030.
I took shot after shot every few minutes hoping to get the dipper, comet and the house in the frame. Gradually the stars came into my field of view, first the bucket then gradually, one by one that stars of the handle.
It all worked out perfectly. With the handle fully in the frame the bucket was gradually moving off to the right side an soon to go out of the shot. Once in the right place with all the stars, the comet and the house nicely framed up I experimented with the shutter speed and ISO.
We were both pretty confident by about 1130 that we had the images we came for. Feeling pretty proud for executing the plan we headed home leaving the bugs and howling coyotes to their own.
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First off, I was on a country road in a mosquito haven and they were having a field day on my blood. Next my headlamp failed, not sure what is going on there and have to look at that today. Then as the night wore on I had to re point the camera to keep the composition interesting as the comet appeared to move as the earth turned. This was a challenge as the comet was barely visible in the viewfinder and the foreground was not visible at all. Lots of trial shots to get it right and then gradually rotate the camera as time passed.
My intervalometer would occasionally stop shooting if I had made a camera setting adjustment. Not supposed to do this but just one more challenge while the bugs continued their dive bomb attacks.
Well after about 3 hours I had enough shots to work with. The comet was getting closer to the horizon and becoming dimmer as it was viewed through more and more atmosphere.
Glad I went out and put in the effort. Let me know what you think. Does the shot work, was it worth the effort. It won't be back for 7000 years so I guess this might be my only opportunity.
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If interested then let’s get this thing off the ground. Virtual meetings are the new norm and the perfect means of gathering for comradery. So long as there is free virtual meeting software there will be no fee to join. I’m posting this on social media but seldom use it. If you are keen to join please email me at [email protected].
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And, once images start to accumulate getting proactive in organizing them is critical. In my software development career I have seen more undertakings fail for an inability to manage data rather than gather it. Finding a workflow that produces not only great results but organized results is crucial to moving your photographic business forward.
So today was mostly about organizing photos - I had reached that critical point where it was counter productive to keep shooting otherwise.
This wasn't a big bang experience. I have been thinking about it for a long time, churning it over in that lovely alpha mind state that happens drifting off to sleep.
Processing is the second task in the triad of producing great pictures. My skills have been improving - I think. Today I took a picture that I really wanted to work but was disappointed in the raw image. It was taken a couple of weeks ago in Southern Ontario at the West Montrose covered bridge. This bridge is a big hit with photographers and when Carol and I arrived on the scene it was something the paparazzi would be familiar with. Grounds surrounding the bridge are all marked as private but there are those that feel exempt from such polite rules of engagement. Well I felt a bit embarressed by association to be there, camera in hand. My work was done hastily and so of course I was disappointed with the initial results.
Well this seemed like the perfect opportunity for some creative post processing and in the end I am pretty pleased with the result.
Check out my image of the covered bridge in my 'Structures' album. I'd appreciate your feedback.
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Now that I am not working ten and twelve hour days it seems that each day brings a greater joy in the appreciation of what this thing called being 'alive' really is. Through my photography, life itself is coming into focus. I see beauty in simplicity and spirituality in nature. I see that my spiritual journey through Transcendental Mediation in the 70's, appreciation of the the American Transcendentalist movement of the the mid 1800's and more recently Pantheism are all one and the same. While not allowing satisfactory amounts of time to nurture my spirituality while earning a living, I now do have that margin to my life and rejoice in the good fortune and luxury remaining to me.
It is not clear yet where this is taking me but I am embarking on a journey to be certain. Photography is a tool I use to try to express what I feel as I experience the natural world. And for me, there is no divinity other than nature itself. That is sufficient and full and is not wanting any diety, scripture or guru.
]]>The trip began with a stop at the Revenna general store conveniently located just 4km from the trail head. Here I bought the official Kolapore map - a must because of the size and complexity of the area, as well as the prerequisite home made butter tarts and date squares - essential for pre and post hike self indulgence.
The weather was threatening and before we reached the end of the trail the rain started. But thankfully we were out of the woods before the storm arrived in earnest.
Definitely some place we plan on going to time and again. A wonderful place to explore and we hope to join the trail association for Kolapore in the near future.
]]>Earlier in the day I went out to Tiny Marsh. This is just such a jewel to me; close to home and a large wetland area with lots of wildlife. I had been trying to photograph the Ring Necked Pheasant and had had several opportunities for 'souvenir' shots on earlier outings. But yesterday I got lucky and got a shot that at least I can be proud of if not all I want it to be. I had come out of the woods and my EOS 60D was on shutter priority mode at 400 and auto ISO. When I saw the bird I was in a field with lots of sun and although I had the presence of mind to put the camera in high speed burst mode I didn't think to move it manual mode and jack up the shutter speed and stop down the aperture. As a result the picture is Ok but not as sharp as I would like.
But, any time I go out, if I get at least one shot that pleases me I feel it has been a worthwhile experience. With each shot I learn what to do differently or better.
It was a great day. Check out my pictures of Tiny Marsh.
]]>Yesterday was Kite Fest and we went down to the 'main end' to enjoy the festivities; huge kites, hundreds of restored old cars, suds, surf and of course lots of eye candy.
Carol took some great shots, she really does well with the camera in the hustle bustle environments. I on the other hand was just a bit overwhelmed. I need to be a little more deliberate; setting up, composing, check, check and re-check. That's just my nature. So, while Carol really did well, I did not - but we compliment each other.
In the evening we took a bottle of wine and our chairs down to our end of the beach to enjoy the sunset. With an overcast sky rolling in it was all a bit flat but I made the best of it and found myself back in my element. I hope you like the images I posted in my Beach Gallery.
Stephen
]]>It seems that it is always difficult to design blog content on demand and, as I am just getting started here I won't force any creativity I may have and will just leave this as is for today.
I appreciate each and every visit and hope that you will sign my guestbook.
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